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Amber Finau
New Zealand

Four Steps To Standing on a Horse - Penny Howard - 2014
Amber Finau - mother of three, nanny of four. Tribal affiliations to Taranaki and Opotiki, bonds of love to Fatai and Lakepa, Tongatapu. Now living in Auckland.


The tui taunts me with her call
Reminding me
What I’ve lost
What I can no longer call mine
What you handed her
What she’s taken
The hurt is still as fresh
As the year ago
You revealed your treachery
Betrayer! Oath Breaker!
And so you find me here
Alone, bereft, destroyed
Pick up this carcass
Dispose of these remains
The woman I was has long departed
This is but the shell of the broken-hearted


I never knew
The depth of my love
Till you asked that I release you
But tis easier asked than done, my love
The ties are long and intertwined
Bound firmly round my heart
Wrapped round the years that we have shared
And woven through with memories

I’ve wept a well of tears
I’ve cried a river of woe
And still I find I ‘ve more to shed
At the thought of letting go

I’d rather end this miserable life
Than bid our love farewell
So I stand poised on misery’s edge
My destination, hell